Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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