Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
