you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I want a musical about memes.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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