So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
