Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
