Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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