it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1047 607 share tweet
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize