how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Randomize
