Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
