i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
