I feel great
I just peed on a car
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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