She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
