Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I wish i was in the wii world.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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