woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
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