I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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