I think i sorta joined a cult last night
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I FOUND THE LEGS
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
