the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
My ass is underappreciated
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize
