i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
