S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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