All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
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