Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Can you bring me the toilet please
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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