Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
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