My boss' voice literally gives me gas
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
