there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize