I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
third nipple confirmed
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
