I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
