I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
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We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
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I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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