Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize