Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
