But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
