im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize