Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
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