So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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