There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize