Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring