Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize