im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
