I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
The power of my boobs compel you
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
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