Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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