I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
He passed out mid-signature
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
You've changed since you got that strap on
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
