he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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