I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
