So drunk, too bad you don't want this
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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