Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober

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  (608): I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober http://tfl.nu/eoub
  Replies (27) Good night (4500) Bad night (640)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  did u really fuck my little sister???

  (706): View more from Georgia

  im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"

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  (678): did u really fuck my little sister??? (706): im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess" http://tfl.nu/dz4c
  Replies (155) Good night (15725) Bad night (1839)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.

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  (919): he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'. http://tfl.nu/h82o
  Replies (13) Good night (3696) Bad night (1157)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.

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  (724): you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles. http://tfl.nu/nryc
  Replies (5) Good night (2669) Bad night (882)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.

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  (612): She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask. http://tfl.nu/em4a
  Replies (5) Good night (1508) Bad night (716)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.

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  (717): Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment. http://tfl.nu/vmb7
  Replies (2) Good night (1376) Bad night (784)
• Favorite

  (912): View more from Georgia

  Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.

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  (912): Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks. http://tfl.nu/l0wp
  Replies (5) Good night (1109) Bad night (429)
• Favorite

  (620): View more from Kansas

  We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.

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  (620): We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night. http://tfl.nu/jjc7
  Replies (8) Good night (938) Bad night (473)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.

  (630): View more from Illinois

  I'm in love.

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  (630): She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot. (630): I'm in love. http://tfl.nu/l0w2
  Replies (3) Good night (1372) Bad night (310)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.

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  (541): k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating. http://tfl.nu/iql3
  Replies (1) Good night (461) Bad night (234)
• Favorite

  (906): View more from Michigan

  hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves

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  (906): hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves http://tfl.nu/z605
  Replies (1) Good night (529) Bad night (186)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.

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  (505): We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing. http://tfl.nu/u4qz
  Replies (2) Good night (837) Bad night (195)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.

  (647): View more from Ontario

  Hey, I'm your guy

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  (613): I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this. (647): Hey, I'm your guy http://tfl.nu/p6u8
  Replies (2) Good night (986) Bad night (242)
• Favorite

  (432): View more from Texas

  Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.

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  (432): Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless. http://tfl.nu/ih1y
  Replies (0) Good night (534) Bad night (183)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life

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  (610): Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life http://tfl.nu/zhdb
  Replies (2) Good night (257) Bad night (431)

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