Redeem this text for a blowjob
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Btw I puked in your glovebox
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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