Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
