today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
