my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
