That's intense
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
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