We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
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