Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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